This shirt is for the people who don’t start fights…
…but absolutely finish them.
Featuring a vintage-style can of WHOOP ASS, lovingly illustrated like it belongs in your grandma’s pantry — except instead of soup, it’s filled with pure, chaotic vengeance.
Wear it when:
You’re this close to losing your last brain cell
Your coworkers need a visual warning
You want strangers to know you have no problem “circling back aggressively”
You’re built different (in a slightly concerning way)
Soft, bold, and mildly threatening — basically everything your personality isn’t, but wishes it was.
100% ring-spun cotton — soft enough to distract from your worst decisions.
Fabric weight: 6.1 oz/yd² (206.8 g/m²) — thick, like the plot of every bad idea you’ve ever had.
Garment-dyed for that “I’ve washed this 40 times but somehow it looks cooler” vibe.
Relaxed fit — because tight shirts are for people with discipline.
7/8″ double-needle topstitched collar
Twill-taped neck & shoulders for when life pulls at you a little too hard.
Double-needle hems (sleeves, armholes, bottom) — built like a dad who fixes things without instructions.
Blank product sourced from Honduras
(if anyone asks, tell them it was ethically sourced by a guy named Ron).
This shirt is for the people who don’t start fights…
…but absolutely finish them.
Featuring a vintage-style can of WHOOP ASS, lovingly illustrated like it belongs in your grandma’s pantry — except instead of soup, it’s filled with pure, chaotic vengeance.
Wear it when:
You’re this close to losing your last brain cell
Your coworkers need a visual warning
You want strangers to know you have no problem “circling back aggressively”
You’re built different (in a slightly concerning way)
Soft, bold, and mildly threatening — basically everything your personality isn’t, but wishes it was.
100% ring-spun cotton — soft enough to distract from your worst decisions.
Fabric weight: 6.1 oz/yd² (206.8 g/m²) — thick, like the plot of every bad idea you’ve ever had.
Garment-dyed for that “I’ve washed this 40 times but somehow it looks cooler” vibe.
Relaxed fit — because tight shirts are for people with discipline.
7/8″ double-needle topstitched collar
Twill-taped neck & shoulders for when life pulls at you a little too hard.
Double-needle hems (sleeves, armholes, bottom) — built like a dad who fixes things without instructions.
Blank product sourced from Honduras
(if anyone asks, tell them it was ethically sourced by a guy named Ron).