You crack open a fortune cookie hoping for wisdom, luck, or at least something that sounds vaguely spiritual.
Instead, you get the single most persistent threat to modern peace:
Congrats — even your dessert is trying to scam you now.
This tee is for the chronically annoyed, the existentially exhausted, and anyone who has ever blocked a number only to have it call back from a different area code five minutes later.
Finally, a shirt that captures the true spirit of the universe:
absolutely no one is safe, and they will call again.
Wear it ironically. Wear it unironically. Wear it to confuse your waiter at the Chinese restaurant.
Either way, this fortune slaps harder than the last three years of your life.
• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz/yd² (142 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Blank product sourced from Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US
You crack open a fortune cookie hoping for wisdom, luck, or at least something that sounds vaguely spiritual.
Instead, you get the single most persistent threat to modern peace:
Congrats — even your dessert is trying to scam you now.
This tee is for the chronically annoyed, the existentially exhausted, and anyone who has ever blocked a number only to have it call back from a different area code five minutes later.
Finally, a shirt that captures the true spirit of the universe:
absolutely no one is safe, and they will call again.
Wear it ironically. Wear it unironically. Wear it to confuse your waiter at the Chinese restaurant.
Either way, this fortune slaps harder than the last three years of your life.
• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz/yd² (142 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Blank product sourced from Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US